The Huddle - Edition 82

Intro
Coaching and Parenting Through Big Emotions in Youth Sports

Youth sports are filled with moments of joy and celebration — but they also come with nerves, tears, meltdowns, and sometimes, full-blown frustration. If you’ve coached or parented long enough, you’ve seen it all: the kid who quits mid-drill, the one who freezes at bat, or the one who lashes out after a mistake.

According to research from the American Academy of Pediatrics, emotional regulation is still under construction in kids up until their early teen years — with executive functions like impulse control, perspective-taking, and emotional management developing gradually. That means fear, anger, embarrassment, and anxiety are not just common — they’re expected.

But here’s where it gets important: how adults respond can either help a child grow or cause them to shut down. This week, we’ll explore how to better recognize these emotions, understand what they mean, and offer support that actually helps.

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Insight of the week
Recognizing the Signs of Big Emotions in Youth Athletes

Kids often don’t come out and tell you they’re feeling overwhelmed — they show it in other ways. Understanding the cues and context is key to being the kind of coach (or parent) that helps rather than unintentionally adds pressure.

Here are some common red flags that might signal a child is wrestling with big emotions:

• Fear or anxiety: They hesitate to participate, avoid eye contact, hang back during drills, or ask to go to the bathroom frequently. You might notice clenched fists, shallow breathing, or uncharacteristically quiet behavior.

• Frustration or anger: You’ll see it in body language — crossed arms, throwing equipment, aggressive play, or snapping at teammates. Sometimes, it comes after repeated mistakes or feeling like they’ve been treated unfairly.

• Sadness or embarrassment: Kids may withdraw, become overly apologetic, or avoid specific drills they’ve “messed up” before. They might fake an injury or ask to sit out.

One of the most important things to remember is that these aren’t signs of a "bad attitude" — they’re emotional reactions to a high-stakes (in their mind) environment. Especially in competitive sports, the desire to perform and not disappoint adults can be enormous.

If we want to build not just better players, but more emotionally healthy kids, we need to slow down enough to see what’s really happening underneath the surface.

Drill of the week
Block-Out Drill (Rebounding Focus)

Sport: Basketball

Setup

• Divide players into pairs. Each pair should consist of one offensive and one defensive player.

• Position each pair on either side of the key, just above the low blocks.

• Coach stands at the top of the key or free-throw line with the ball.

How to Run It

1. On the coach’s shot (or signal), the defensive player must locate their offensive partner, initiate a strong box out, and maintain position.

2. The offensive player tries to move around the defender to grab the rebound.

3. After the rebound is secured or the ball hits the ground, switch roles.

4. Add progressions: introduce movement before the shot, vary ball trajectories, or turn it into a competition (i.e., best of 5 rebounds).

Coaching Tips

• Emphasize balance: wide stance, low hips, and contact initiated with the forearms (not pushing).

• Reinforce “hit, find, and seal” — make contact, locate the ball, seal off space.

• Praise players who stay disciplined and don’t reach too early.

• Encourage communication (“Shot!” call-out) to trigger team rebounding habits.

Boxing out is one of the most overlooked — but critical — skills, especially for younger players. Teaching it with purpose and consistent reps will pay off in tight game situations.

Coaching tip of the week
How to Support Kids Through Emotional Moments

When big feelings show up at practice or during a game, here are some grounded, practical strategies coaches and parents can use:

• Name it without shame.
  A simple, calm observation like “Looks like that play really frustrated you” helps kids feel seen without being judged. Often, just naming the emotion helps a child begin to regulate it.

• Normalize the experience.
  Share that it's okay to feel scared before a game or frustrated after a missed shot. You can even offer a personal story (“When I played, I used to…”) to show them they’re not alone.

• Give them space.
  Not every emotion needs to be “fixed” in the moment. Sometimes, offering a brief reset — a sip of water, a breather on the bench — is better than diving into a lecture or pep talk.

• Praise effort, not outcome.
  Especially after emotional moments, highlight what the child did well. “I loved how you bounced back and kept trying — that’s what makes a great teammate.”

• Talk later, not in the heat.
  Emotional regulation is limited during heightened moments. After things cool down, ask curious, open-ended questions: “What was going through your mind after that play?” This helps kids reflect without feeling defensive.

Above all, remember: emotional development is part of athletic development. How we respond teaches kids how to navigate pressure, disappointment, and setbacks — all of which they’ll face far beyond sports.

Blog Highlight
How Coaches & Parents Can Lead Through Big Feelings

If you’ve spent any amount of time around youth athletics—whether as a coach in the dugout, a parent on the sideline, or a family carpooling from practice to games—you’ve experienced it: the emotional avalanche that sometimes comes with playing sports. One minute a kid is smiling, nailing a play, or telling you “I’m ready!” and the next minute they’re angry, sad, defeated, or overwhelmed by fear.

And while we might wish every practice and game went smoothly, the reality is that big emotions and youth sports go hand in hand. That’s because children aren’t just learning how to hit a ball or understand a playbook — they’re learning how to handle pressure, failure, success, disappointment, expectations, identity, teamwork, and stress all at once.

The good news? These emotional moments aren’t something to fear — they’re opportunities. But only if we know how to respond as coaches and parents.

This blog is your map for doing just that.

The Volunteer Coach Academy
My Complete Coaching Approach

Thank you for following and engaging with me here.

You’ve seen the tips and tools I share each week—now imagine everything you need to coach with confidence, all in one place. I’ve built a complete course designed specifically for volunteer and parent-coaches to help you feel prepared, supported, and ready to lead. Whether you’re stepping on the field for the first time or just want to get better for your kid’s sake, this course was made for you.

Oh and if you aren’t ready for the course yet, still check out the link to learn more because there’s a free Coach’s Guide that you can start using instantly.

Book highlight
For Coaches, Parents and Youth Athletes

The Constant Coach

Get this for the coach in your life as it provides coaching guidance and insights one day at a time throughout the entire year.

Stories For Young Athletes

Do you have an Young athlete who’s afraid of getting hit by a pitch or who maybe isn’t quite as aggressive on the soccer field as they could be? This book helps kids with a variety of circumstances, in a lot of different sports, through various stories that your child can relate to. It’s perfect for kids 7-11!

Featured Coaching Resources
Aggression and Anxiety Guides

I just released two new guides designed to make your coaching easier and your players more confident:

1. The Aggression Guide
Perfect for the child who plays great at home but hesitates in games. This guide gives you simple, practical strategies to help players be more assertive, engaged, and confident—without pressure or yelling.

2. Calm Under Pressure
A quick, powerful guide for helping young athletes manage anxiety, nerves, and fear of mistakes. You’ll learn what to look for, what to say, and how to support kids during tough moments.

Content
Other Free Content

You might be new to coaching a team or sport. You may be a grizzled coaching veteran. Either way, check out the content section of thecoachingdad.com. You’ll find resources that cover a large number of sports, including game refreshers, position breakdowns, injury management, practice ideas and more.

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